@bethvogt
When I was a child and had trouble falling asleep because I’d had a bad dream, my mom would sit beside my bed and comfort me by telling me to think nice thoughts.
I’d remember swimming in the lake in Vermont during a family vacation. Or winning the class spelling bee. Or playing outside in the rain with the neighborhood kids.
Thinking nice thoughts worked until I grew up and confronted scarier life issues that loomed larger than any nice thoughts I could think.
Yesterday, I talked with a friend who is facing something hard. Something heartbreaking. The kind of situation that steals your breath away and makes everything else in life unimportant.
You can’t fix what’s wrong by thinking nice thoughts.
In the last month, I’ve kept running across the same Bible verse at random times. When I read the same verse in all sorts of different places, I’m reminded once again that, in God’s economy, nothing is random.
“These things I have spoken to you so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 NASB
In context, Jesus is talking to His disciples and He tells them straight up they are going to have tough times.
It might have been nice if Jesus had offered a lighter, brighter message, but I prefer honesty.
After saying the world would have tribulation in it, Jesus didn’t say, “Think nice thoughts.” No. He said to be brave. The courage we need to endure suffering and pain and trials demands a whole lot more than conjuring up nice thoughts about fun times.
When I was talking with my friend about her situation, she said, “I know other people are dealing with hard things too. Harder things.”
As if she had no right to be rocked by the turmoil in her life because someone else’s situation was tougher than hers – worse than hers.
The comparison game is always a trap, and it’s never more dangerous than when we are hurting and begin to compare our pain to someone else’s. Believing the lie that we can’t express how we feel because our trouble is somehow less significant than another person’s struggle undermines our courage.
How can we be brave, how can we embrace the peace God offers us, if we feel we don’t deserve it? Or if we believe someone else deserves it more than we do?
Our struggles should never to be lined up against one another and weighed and measured. Instead, let’s accept when we need encouragement and prayer, knowing there’ll be a time when we provide it for someone else. And never forget that God promises us His peace.
Choosing not to Fix Our Struggles with Nice Thoughts https://bit.ly/3wwwmXz #faith #encouragement Share on X 'Fear may fill our world, but it doesn't have to fill our hearts.' Quote by @MaxLucado #hope #courage Share on X
Comments 12
We have a Savior Who sleeps in the boat while the storm rages on. He IS peace personified. He never experiences fear, and staying connected to Him is the only way to be free from fear. 1 John 4:18
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Wendy: So well said. Thank you for adding such encouragement to the conversation today.
I’m recently coming to the conclusion that peace is the strongest, most valuable commodity we can pursue and then be held by. Thanks, Beth.
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Good morning, Dee: So many people that I know are weary because of circumstances they are facing. And yes, peace holds us steady. His peace that overcomes it all.
Comparison is a trap! I hadn’t looked at thinking nice thoughts as not honouring how we are feeling. Thanks for showing me how Jesus calls us to go to Him, not to ignore (or try to control) when we are hurting or struggling.
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Lynn: Thinking nice thoughts may be where we all begin in an effort to stand up against the things we are afraid of. But real life struggles require so much more. Courage. Faith supported by truth.
In the belly of the beast,
this thought holds me snugly,
that, friend, at the very least
I’m not slow, soft and ugly.
Sure the pain’s beyond belief,
and days, in main, are s****y,
but I still get a laugh’s relief
by singing “I Feel Pretty”,
which once I did when Barb’s church friends
dropped by to pray for me,
and they thought, “Oh, thus it ends;
he’s lost his sanity!”,
not knowing what I understand;
balance is Bud in either hand.
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Oh, Andrew: Your poetry always lightens my heart. Lightens my load. And reminds me that perspective is everything.
Praying for you, my friend.
Beth, first, I’m so sorry for your friend. I am thankful she has a safe place, wisdom-speaking friend in you. That’s one of the best gifts when we walk through heartrending seasons.
I’ve had to learn that comparing pain is useless. I like how you describe this act as something that undermines our courage. God knows our trials, and He knows what He’s going to work in each one. What He asks is that we lean into Him, rather than trying to get through them on our own.
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Yes, Jeanne, God asks that we lean into Him in the hard seasons of our lives, so we can receive His peace and His strength.
It’s really hard because you can’t win in the comparison game. You just have to be. Your worst is valid.
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Denise: It’s so true — you can’t win at the comparison game. I love how you say even our worst is valid.