In Others’ Words: The Better Friend

Beth VogtFriendship, In Others' Words, Quotes 9 Comments

Friendship Nouwen 2016

A few weeks ago I heard that September is National Friendship month. I liked the sound of that: a whole month celebrating, among other things, friendship.

It’s also National Honey Month. And National Courtesy Month. And National Sewing Month. And National Blueberry Popsicle Month. On a more serious note, September is also National Suicide Prevention Month.

And that leads me right back to spending the month of September focusing on friends because, well, friends can make a difference when you’re hurting. When you’re convinced the pain won’t ever stop … that the ache inside your heart is unbearable. That’s when a friend can make all the difference.

A friend chooses to be someone who comes alongside you and says, “You’re not alone.” Not, “I understand” — because maybe they don’t. But that’s okay because they don’t have to understand. Being present … being available … being there is so, so much more important.

Because only when someone chooses to be with us in the midst of our mess and our tears and our questions-without-answers are we willing to trust them enough to “touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”

And yes, yes, I know that sometimes even being there for someone else doesn’t stop the worst-of-all tragedies from happening. We are left with our own questions-without-answers. People we love make choices … but we can remember that we made choices too — to show up. To share another’s pain … as much as we were able.

In Your Words: Which friend (or friends) has shown up in your life not offering advice and cures, but rather to share your pain? How do you try to show up in your friends’ lives?

[Tweet “In Others’ Words: The Better Friend #InOthersWords #quotes #NationalFriendshipMonth”] [Tweet “”When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find it is those who … have chosen rather to share our pain …” #quotes #HenriNouwen #friendship”]

 

Comments 9

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  1. Beautiful post, Beth. National Friendship Month. I like that. I have been blessed to have friends in my life who listen and love on me when I’m hurting. I try to do this for others, as well. I hope I foster an environment where people feel safe to share with me. Thanks for the reminder on how to be the best sort of friend.

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  2. You. You are the friend who showed up the morning I was feeling so desperate and lost and alone. You reached out to me and listened and stood with me in prayer. I firmly believe the Lord brings just who we need into our lives in these critical moments, being His hands and feet. YOU are a great example of what it means to be a friend! Happy Friendship Month, from one friend to another 🙂

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  3. Beth, I love that September is National Honey Month! How cool is that? But more importantly, I’ve been thinking about your question all day. I can’t count how many times you’ve shown up at just the right moment to encourage me, keep me writing, pray for me. You are such a blessing. Your friendship is a sweet gift from God.

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