Choosing to Make Room for Grace

Beth Vogtacceptance, Beth K. Vogt, challenges, childhood, choices, expectations, family, grace, In Others' Words, Life, perspective, Quotes, stress 8 Comments

@bethvogt

 

I was sitting in the waiting room at the doctor’s office yesterday. My youngest daughter had an appointment not me. Once we get all of her “Oh, wait! We need to do this before you go to college” appointments checked off the list, I’ll worry about my stuff.

Anyway, back to sitting in the waiting room.

There were other people in the room, including a mom with her two young children. Isn’t there always a mom with young children in every doctor’s waiting room? For a while, all was calm. Quiet. The young boy and girl – I pegged them at preschool to early elementary school age – were distracted by the toys and books in the kids’ area.

But only for so long.

Then the whining started. The crying. The wrestling against the mom’s gentle physical restraint.

This mom tried. She probably thought she tried and failed because her children weren’t behaving. 

But that’s not the truth at all.

The truth is, waiting is no fun for anyone. We adults have learned to deal with time passing without things happening like we want it to better than kids do. Usually.

And before any comments digress into a discourse about how doctors are always late, I should let you know my husband is a physician. And he hates being late for appointments, too. If he’s behind schedule, it’s usually because he’s taking care of an unexpected medical need. Or an emergency. So there’s that.

And yes, I digressed a bit.

Back to the mom in the waiting room …

I remember all the years I was that mom of cranky kiddos who were tired of waiting. Maybe you remember being that mom … or you are that mom. Or you’ve sat beside that mom in a waiting room. Or walked past her in a store aisle, averting your eyes.

Here’s the thing: More times than not, that mom is a good mom. And more times than not, her children are good kids. Yes, I get that there are parents who let their kids run wild. They are the mom-minority.

So the quiet waiting room was disrupted for a bit by bored children. Ever been a bored kid who didn’t want to be in a doctor’s office on a summer day? Or a bored adult just tired of waiting? What’s needed at times like these is grace, not judgement. Believe me, the mom wished her children were being quiet more than anyone else in the room did.

And someone offered that mom grace. The person happened to be my eldest daughter, who’d stopped by to say hello while I waited for her youngest sister. A mom of two young girls herself. As the now clearly harried mom was called back for her appointment, my daughter walked over to her. Offered her a smile and a gentle touch on her arm. And then said, “You’re doing a good job.”

The tension left the mom’s face, replaced with a smile. The tightness in her shoulders eased. All it took was a moment of grace to change that mom’s day. To remind her that being a good mom has nothing to do with being perfect or having perfect children. Moms need to know that hard moments happen. They need to remember to love themselves and their kids through the ups and downs of every day.

Come to think of it, that’s a good reminder for each one of us, isn’t it?

Choosing to Make Room for Grace http://bit.ly/2NaYzkb #perspective #motherhood Click To Tweet 'The meaning of life. The wasted years of life ... God answers the mess of life with one word: grace.' Quote by Max Lucado http://bit.ly/2NaYzkb #grace #perspective Click To Tweet

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Comments 8

  1. The waiting isn’t difficult,
    hearing death’s fell elocution
    that borders on the sibilant,
    foretelling mine own execution.
    I am brought here by malignancies
    that grow in their own time,
    feeding all my foolish fancies
    into a futile paradigm.
    But in the waiting I’m content
    to go on as I had before
    with the goal…nay, the intent
    of opening tomorrow’s golden door.
    Death would ask that I surrender,
    but that’s a service I shall not render.

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  2. You’re a fighter with a poet’s heart, Andrew. This line, “But in the waiting, I’m content
    to go on as I had before with the goal…nay, the intent of opening tomorrow’s golden door,” is so beautiful. Thank you for that.

    Beth, you must be so proud of your girls. Their self-confidence is amazing and stems from the love and encouragement that flows so naturally from you two. What a blessing! Thank you for the reminder to extend grace to those we may be quick to judge. We never know what kind of life someone else lives beyond our sight.

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  3. Perfect. KB probably has no idea how much of a ministry even that caring touch and gentle words were. Things like that make the difference in so many situations. I’ll be back in MN and more or less back on board starting late Fri., in Edmonton now and all is VERY well!

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  4. So so true! I was with a group of ladies last night and we were talking about encouragement, and what that looked like on a daily basis. We all agreed that a simple smile, a kind word or gesture can lift someone’s day more than we can imagine. It seems so insignificant that a smile can really mean that much to anyone, yet it may be the very thing to turn someone’s (or maybe our own) focus away from their despair or loneliness.
    A phone call, a note, a text, or an invitation for coffee or tea can make a huge difference. I know three friends I need to touch right now! Bye!!

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