@bethvogt
My friend Scoti called me after I’d posted my blog “Don’t Believe Everything You Think” last week. The one where I confessed to losing a wrestling match with my thoughts for 48 hours. And how connecting with a friend and focusing on the Truth helped me win the victory.
Scoti: Are you okay? I’m worried about you.
Me (laughing): You read the blog post, didn’t you?
Yep, she had. Good friend that she is, Scoti wanted to make certain I was really okay.
Yes, I’m really okay.
I wouldn’t have written last week’s post if I wasn’t.
After Scoti and I finished talking, I grabbed my computer and scanned my recent blogs. Is my honest writing focused too much on struggles and not enough on hope?
I don’t think so. (Of course, you can call me on it if you think otherwise.) But I also believe you have to first be willing to share your disappointments or discouragements before you can share how you’ve found hope.
Back to Scoti.
I’m thankful Scoti called me. We all need trustworthy friends who care enough to make the risky phone calls. Who dare to have the hard conversations with us. Who want a soul-deep answer when they ask, “How are you?”
Scoti and I have invested both the time and effort needed to earn one another’s trust. Funny thing is, we look back on the beginnings of our friendship and laugh. Back then, we both pretended to be okay. One honest conversation at a time, we relaxed and got real with each other.
Scoti likes to compare our friendship to the Velveteen Rabbit because it’s all about the process of becoming real. If you haven’t read the children’s book The Velveteen Rabbit by British author Margery Williams, I highly recommend you do.
Here’s the other thing about Scoti: She called to check on me while she’s still recovering from a life-threatening battle with pneumonia. Scoti has enough going on in her life … she battles every day just to breathe. She doesn’t need to worry about me. But she looked past her challenges and called me because that’s part of an honest, caring friendship.
How about you? Who can you be real with?
Friendships are Risky Business https://bit.ly/3kbQ5bq #encouragment #friendships Click To Tweet 'A true friend never gets in your way unless you're going down.' #quote by author Arnold Glasow #friendship #kindness Click To Tweet
Comments 15
There are horrible four-letter words and then there are redeeming ones–like love and risk. Where would our lives or our world be without risk? Relationships not formed and lives deepened. New continents undiscovered if brave men had not sailed the seas. Spiritual depths unknown if we didn’t risk trusting and taking a step into the Red Sea or across Jordan.
Good, Beth. Thanks.
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Dee: I love your perspective on this. Of course, you know I love and value your perspective on life. But the idea of redeeming words like love and risk. So life-giving. And thank you,too, for being a trustworthy friend.
My friend Marsha is one I can be real with.
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Denise: What a blessing Marsha is, yes? And I am certain you bless her in the same way.
Getting real with someone is so important, especially with filtered social media feeds dominance! I’ve learned if I am real with my friends, they feel safe to be real with me too.
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Lynn: You make such a good point about social media allows us to filter our lives — polish and perfect them.
Dear Beth,
Your realness is why I really appreciate you.
Hugs & blessings – Wendy Mac
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Thank you, my friend. Blessings to you — and a warm hug, too.
“But I also believe you have to first be willing to share your disappointments or discouragements before you can share how you’ve found hope.” This is so true! People need to know they are not alone in their struggles. They also need to know there is a way out from under them. By sharing our stories, we are able to reveal God’s glory.
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Yes, Lisa, sharing our stories is so valuable. We draw closer to one another … and we reflect God’s image to each other, too.
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Beth, I too try to be authentic in my posts. And sometimes wonder if I’ve focused too much on the challenges and not enough on hope. But how can our hope communicate reality to others if we’ve never experienced the challenges so many go through. And it seems I get the highest number of responses when I’m raw and sharing, finding hope — or still searching for it — in the middle of the muddle.
Thanks for sharing!
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Carol: So well said … I agree with you. We have to be honest about the struggles we experience and then layer the hope we’ve found, the hope we cling to, through every word we write.
Being raw, real, and transparent in our writing and relationships, eases the stress others feel when they struggle. And it’s comforting to know that you’re not crazy, when you feel normal feelings that many, or most, suppress. When physically down for the count, and I can’t get up and race around at my usual speed until my body heals, I can still use my heart and brain to care about and to pray for others. Love you, Beth.
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Love you too, Brill. And your insight is so good: being transparent in our writing eases others’ stress.